An Open Letter to the Ladies of My Son’s Fourth Grade Class

Gals,

Your Valentines explicitly mention an Anna and Elsa tattoo that you will quickly discover is nonexistent. Bear with me while I explain.

What started out as a simple combination of procrastination (and a sincere but ultimately disproven belief we had leftover Valentines in the junk drawer) on my part and overall disinterest on Olly’s part (he only cared about making a Valentines box that looked like a spaceship) ballooned into a full-grown crisis when Olly let me know about the dearth of tattoos last night.

Olly decided to tape (on-brand) Frozen pencils on the Valentines. He completed all the cards himself. Please feel free to use the pencils to draft blog posts complaining about the oversight. If it consoles you, I bought my husband three loaves of gluten-free bread and a card for Valentine’s Day. A high-five is under consideration.

Enjoy the upcoming President’s Day weekend that was cut short because the school district doesn’t build snow days into the calendar and now has to make up time.

All my best,

Online Offal

An Open Letter to the Ladies of My Son’s Fourth Grade Class

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